New to the challenge? Read this first.
Ladies, our bedrooms should be a haven. I find, it’s pretty hard to get in the mood with piles of dirty laundry waiting to be folded staring you down. So, your first assignment is to turn your bedroom into a romantic retreat.
- Lose the TV: I once watched an Oprah (though not in my bedroom) where a woman proudly admitted that she watched Oprah while having sex with her husband. That’s about the worst thing you can do with a TV in the bedroom, but frankly I can’t think of many better ideas for it. I love TV as much as the next gal, but it is a passion killer in the bedroom. One study showed that couples who have TVs in the bedroom have sex half as often as those who don’t. So lose the TV and focus on each other while in bed.
- Tone down pictures of the kids: I can’t think of anything that kills the mood faster than glancing over at pictures of my kids. Don’t get me wrong, I think my kids are the cutest things since sliced bread (yet another metaphor that escapes me), but I keep their pictures up in other parts of the house. If you really want pics of the kids in your room, just avoid putting them right next to the bed.
- Get rid of the clutter: Try and keep your room picked up. If I see messes waiting to be cleaned up, I have a hard time focusing on the task at hand. If you really want to be creative, tell the hubby you can’t focus on the task at hand with the room so messy. You will be amazed at how quickly the room stays clean. Of course, I would NEVER encourage manipulation…
- Get romantic lighting:No one wants to see themselves naked under harsh fluorescent lighting. Install dimmer switches or light bulbs that can be set on different light settings. Better yet, get some yummy smelling candles and create an even more romantic mood.
- Some mood music: Get a CD player and put on some music that puts you in the mood. I won’t even give suggestions cause one persons Enya is another persons Van Morrison. Use whatever works for you.
There you go. I’m going easy on you the first week. Check back next Saturday for your weekly challenge.
Are you in?
Candace
says:
I know that I should lose the TV, but I just can’t yet. I do all of my laundry folding and ironing in my bedroom and I couldn’t do it without TV. I am totally with you on the pics of the kids. I only have pics of Hubs and myself in my bedroom. One of these days I’m planning on putting some of my bridal pics – framed- in our bathroom just to give me a little more confidence when I need it. Mood lighting is a must and so is keeping the clutter at bay. This is going to be fun- I’m so glad that you’re doing this.
[Reply]
October 5th, 2007 at 11:12 pm
Nic
says:
Wow that is a challenge. I definitely need to do something about the laundry in my bedroom.. as well as the watching sitcoms while I’m in bed and he isn’t yet. Again, thanks for the tips!
[Reply]
October 6th, 2007 at 6:43 am
georgiamom
says:
Okay, I’ve read your challenge and after 2 kids and 13 years of marriage, I’m going to have give them some consideration. I agree with you, but this is not the easiest of topics in our house (okay, I’m being too honest and this will most likely result in someone referring us to marriage therapy), but it’s complicated. This use to be the best part of our relationship, but things happen and things change. You get busy with life and kids and it’s easy to loose the romantic part of your relationship. We’ve discussed this many times and have sought on a number of occasions to look for ways to get back on track. But, we end up back in our old habits. Maybe this is what I need to pick up the pass again. Geez Jill, why couldn’t you have done a shopping challenge or a eating out challenge? That would have been so much easier!
And I’m saying this with reservations… I’m in.
[Reply]
October 6th, 2007 at 7:47 am
lifeafterbaby
says:
I’ve always refused to have a TV in our bedroom. If I’m not the most exciting thing in our bedroom to my husband, then our marriage has some serious problems. I’ve been picking up our room (Dan’s stuff mostly…grrr…) and making the bed and making sure our room is clean and neat. So far, he hasn’t noticed, or just hasn’t said anything. No pics of kids, great lighting. Guess that means I’m in. What’s next? (shopping trip to Victoria Secret, shopping trip to Victoria Secret, shopping trip to Victoria Secret)
I have to totally agree with Jill about your room being a haven. For those of you who’ve already mentioned that you fold laundry, iron, or watch TV in your room, I’d say you need to re-evaluate and move those activities to another room. It’s radical,and it’ll speak volumes to your hubby when he asks why you would take out the TV and start folding the laundry in the living room or kitchen table, because you’re really doing it to honor him and your marriage by keeping it sacred. If I have to go all junior high and dare you to do it, I will.
[Reply]
October 6th, 2007 at 9:31 am
Jean
says:
I heard this tid bit of keeping a clean room years ago, and I must say that it really does help. I find I can’t do much of anything with a room in disarray.
I look forward already to next weeks challenge!! This is a great idea. Thanks Jill!!
[Reply]
October 6th, 2007 at 10:09 am
Janet
says:
I think this is a great idea. It gets harder (no pun intended) as you get older. Your suggestions are all good. God knows what He is doing. Maybe putting a copy of the verses where they are easily viewed would be helpful, too. I believe He will honor out attempts to obey. I’m in!!!!!!
[Reply]
October 6th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
thediaperdiaries
Twitter: DiaperDiaries
says:
Yes ladies, that would be my mother entering the challenge. I may need therapy when this is all done.
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October 6th, 2007 at 1:10 pm
adventuremom
says:
Ok so I mentioned that we should apply some of these tactics to our bedroom because we could really spice up our love life. But we are not going to focus too much on this until after the baby is born.
Great challenge!
[Reply]
October 7th, 2007 at 7:51 pm
anne
says:
Andy has always been anti-tv-in-the-bedroom. He thinks it looks trashy, and I’ve never been partial either way so it’s ok with me. Our bedroom seems like it is always the last room to get made over when we’re decorating, but it did finally get done with it’s perfect mood touch lamps and cozy touches. I’m a big fan of letting him know that the laundry and the clutter “need” to be taken care of first. Hmm…
And I’m with Jenna on the trip to Vickie’s. Granted, everything fits weirdly right now, but most of that stuff is only tops and bottoms anyway!! When’s the van picking us up?
[Reply]
October 8th, 2007 at 9:12 am
Nic
says:
OK, picking up my bedroom definitely worked!
[Reply]
October 8th, 2007 at 12:40 pm
SAHMmy Says
says:
Great advice! Before we had kiddos, I used to have a picture of my parents in the bedroom–it got a little creepy so I moved it to the living room. Now our bedroom only has pictures of my husband and me looking fabulous in younger days. Seeing proof that I was once a sweet young thing inspires me to keep it up! My appearance, people! My appearance.
[Reply]
October 8th, 2007 at 5:05 pm
lifeafterbaby
says:
Man, some of you girls are dirty-talkers! Woo-wee! Nice work ladies.
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October 9th, 2007 at 10:07 am
Meagan
says:
I am anxious to try it. I am not sure about the TV, its the only one w/ Tivo, but we will see, I cant wait to get home and clean up the room
[Reply]
October 9th, 2007 at 1:48 pm
sunshinekmp
says:
I found your site from RocksInMyDryer’s works for me Wednesday. I was intrigued and read about your challenge. I agree a clean room works wonders!!! We do have a tv in our bedroom, as it helps me to fall asleep. (My husband does shift work, so he’s often not home to sleep in our bed….) I will be bookmarking your site and will try and work on this challenge…it can only be good for us I’m sure!!
[Reply]
October 10th, 2007 at 8:34 am
Mrs. Turner
says:
Just found your site today through links on numerous blogs… I love the site – the challenge is a wake up call for me. Our first baby (4 month old Rebekkah) is a blessing to hubby and I, given we miscarried December 2005, but I do tend to put her needs (and my fatigue from caring for her) in front of my hubby’s needs. I have bookmarked your site and I’m in with the challenge! Thank you so much for your site!!
[Reply]
October 12th, 2007 at 12:45 pm
mytotalchaos
says:
I’m in! Although cleaning up our bedroom is going to be quite a task. It’s where I tend to stuff everything that I don’t want people to see or where I quickly hide piles of laundry when company comes over unexpectly. I’m not sure about the TV though.. I can’t get to sleep without it on. We’ll give it a try!
[Reply]
October 12th, 2007 at 1:01 pm
screwloose
says:
Okay, so I have to comment on your comment on “the greatest thing since sliced bread”. The way our food packaging has changed over the years, I think we should change the saying to “the greatest thing since bagged lettuce”! What do you think??
[Reply]
October 21st, 2007 at 9:27 pm
Tarah
says:
What a great idea! Christian need to hear this. I’m in and I’d love to put the link on my blog. I have to said that I have don’t all 5 things, prior to your post, so it makes me feel better and that my hubby and I are heading in the right direction. We have a 2 month old and 2 babies in heaven and I’ve had to be on strick bed rest for all 3 pregnancies, which means no sex, we are finally getting back into the swing of things again but I think your challenge is going to make recovery that much quicker. Thanks!
[Reply]
November 17th, 2007 at 8:50 am
Amanda
Twitter: EnchantingHavoc
says:
This is something I really need to work on this week – I swear my clothes all over the place do not scream romantic.
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February 2nd, 2008 at 12:29 am
Qtpies7~
says:
Week one is going to take me a loong time, lol.
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February 3rd, 2008 at 1:16 pm
Red
says:
Great ideas!
We’re making plans for setting up a newlywed nest and I’d mentioned the no-TV idea. Fiance was going to argue until I said something about that study. Now seems like the TV will move out of the bedroom as soon as I move in.
I’ll just have to work on my tendency toward clutter.
[Reply]
February 3rd, 2008 at 1:57 pm
carrien
says:
You mean that place where most of my children sleep? Not that that has ever stopped us. I don’t personally find the blissfully asleep faces of my babies a turnoff at all. The sound of them stirring in their sleep on the other hand…
Our boudoir is most often the living room sofa, or the bathroom where we can lock ourselves in. And yes the sight of dirty dishes is very distracting. So I turn off the light and light a candle if I think they’ll drive me crazy.
[Reply]
February 25th, 2008 at 2:38 am
Kate
says:
What a wonderful challenge! Sex is so important, I admit that we have six children and well I hope the good Lord doesn’t bless us with anymore….So sometimes I do say “no” to sex just cause I know I am fertile myrtle. But when life is stressful and DH and I have actually “gotten together” it makes life not so bad. I’m in. I’ve already started on the bedroom.
[Reply]
February 26th, 2008 at 10:43 am
Sandy M
says:
Ok, I am starting on week #1. Deep cleaning and de-cluttering the bedroom tomorrow. I already do the no tv in the bedroom thing. Then this weekend off to buy candles, and mood music. This is going to be exciting.
[Reply]
February 27th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
Tami
says:
I’m late but I’m in. Decluttering will be my biggest chore for the bedroom. This is going to be great. We have 4 kids so anything I read will help.
[Reply]
February 27th, 2008 at 9:53 pm
Emily
says:
I just now found this and am going to visit it weekly. I will spend time each day this week cozying up my boudoir!
[Reply]
March 1st, 2008 at 3:27 pm
Beth@Not a Bow in Sight
says:
This is an awesome idea! TV is officially out of the bedroom. Pictures of kids too. Decluttering definitely helps me concentrate
Beth@Not a Bow in Sights last blog post..Auld Ang Syne and all that stuff
[Reply]
January 2nd, 2009 at 12:09 am
Christy
says:
Good stuff! Already good with most of this, but I do tend to let my bedroom get alittle dusty… okay a lot dusty! Looks even worse because all of the furniture in there is black. I’ll do my best to keep up on that. Another confession-my bedroom has been only half painted for like 4 years! But with romantic lighting it’s not THAT bad, right? Okay I’ll fix that too, but it’s gonna take some time!
Looking forward to the next challenge already!
[Reply]
January 5th, 2009 at 9:30 pm
Kristen
says:
We’re big on the No TV rule, too. Music is an EXCELLENT idea. I may just try that tonight. ; ) Ooooo, this challenge is fun already.
Kristens last blog post..Starting tomorrow you can find me…
[Reply]
January 12th, 2009 at 3:28 am