Sorry the challenge is up a tiny bit late. I fell asleep at 9 last night and didn’t get my blogging done. This sounds much more heavenly than it is cause I was up throughout the night wide awake with my internal clock all messed up. This week’s challenge is so important to me as I have had a few close friend’s marriages literally destroyed because of this topic. Keep up all the good work ladies!

We are taking a break from giving you a challenge to work on this week. Instead I want to take a brief moment to get a bit serious and discuss a different kind of challenge. It’s the challenge of maintaining an active and exciting sex life without compromising your purity. I am going way out on a limb and way out of my comfort zone, but because I feel this is so important, I am taking that risk. I have a dear friend who just went through an ugly divorce because of a problem that I think is sadly avoided in Christian circles. In fact, her ex-husband once confessed this problem to a group of Christian men and he was shunned. The problem I refer to is porn. In this case, it started with porn and spiraled into affairs and worse. Devastating does not even begin to describe her experience.

Porn is a 57 billion dollar industry. Can you even wrap your brain around that number? Sadly, 50% of Christian men admit to viewing it. 13% of women also confess to the same thing. I have had a few conversations lately with men and women whose lives and marriages have suffered major devastation because of porn coming into their lives.

Let me just give you my humble opinion on the matter. Porn has no business in your marriage. I have heard people argue that it enhances things in the bedroom or that it is just something men do and it is no big deal. Let me just caution you about this. First of all, who can live up to a porn movie? Not only the bodies, but the unrealistic performances. There is nothing realistic or healthy about it. The problem is it causes us to start to view sex as “dirty” and “forbidden.” God did not create sex to be either. I would implore you to take a good hard look at the affect this is truly having on your marriage.

I am not an expert in this matter and thankfully it is not something that has been an issue in our marriage. However, let’s not as women be naive about our husband’s struggles. Nearly all men struggle with lust, and porn just feeds that struggle. I am certainly not suggesting that every man is a closet sex addict, but I am certainly advocating that we do whatever we can to protect the sanctity of our marriages.

If this is something that you think may be a problem in your marriage head over to one of my favorite organizations helping Christians overcome their addictions XXXChurch or New Life Ministries.  In the end, our challenge in marriage isn’t just about having great sex, but it’s to maintain a great and healthy sex life over the long haul of marriage. I know I have probably made this sound a lot simpler than it is, but I just want to get a dialogue started. If this is a problem or struggle for you, please seek out a trusted counselor to walk you through it.

Now that you know my little secret, I should just confess that I haven’t done a challenge in like 6 weeks. It is hard to step up to the plate when you constantly feel like hurling. But I think I am getting over the hump so I am getting back on the horse (DOUBLE ENTENDRES EVERYWHERE!!!). You know the best place to get back in the swing of things? Well it ain’t your house with the kids down the hall. So the hubby and I took a little weekend away this past weekend and it was heavenly. It is amazing how much more “in the mood” you are when someone else is cleaning your room.

How long has it been since you and the hubby have been away from the kids? Cause I think it is time for a little getaway.

Now, I recognize everyone can’t pick up and head out for a warm weather weekend away. A weekend “vacation” doesn’t even have to mean leaving home. Grab a grandparent who is dying for some time with her grandbabies, ship them off and have a weekend together without kids. Or consider staying in town at a local affordable hotel. You could even swap houses with a really, really generous friend who wants to take on your kids.

We didn’t do so good with this after the first kid was born. One of us (who will remain nameless to protect his innocence) didn’t want to leave her for the weekend. Little did he know what awaited him when we went away. Suddenly the wife was feeling, how should I put it…much more amorous than usual without the stress of domesticity weighing her down. All it took was one vacation and he has been eagerly planning weekends away ever since. EAGERLY!

Maybe you are the one afraid to leave your precious kiddos behind. Let me remind you one day those kids are going to grow up and leave home. Then you and your spouse who have forgotten to take time for each other will look across the table and wonder who you have become. It is so important to your marriage (and your kiddos) that you take time away from them to remember why you fell in love in the first place, before those kids starting competing for all your love and attention.

So your assignment this week is to block out a weekend away on the calendar. Nothing fancy, the only rule is no kids allowed and lots of lovin’ happening while your away. Again, this doesn’t need to be an expensive vacation to the Carribean. Our trip this weekend was to a budget hotel that was free using hotel points my husband has accumulated from work travel. I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments on how to get away on a budget.

*This week isn’t a “sex” challenge per se, but it will help your sex life nonetheless. I have to say, I need the encouragement too as I am currently throwing my gym membership money down the tube. Maybe I can count that as stimulating the economy?

Ladies, it is time to revisit our New Year’s resolutions. Cause I know if you are anything like me you made one somewhere along the lines of losing the baby weight, eating healthy, fitting into your “skinny jeans” or resisting the urge to polish off the whole sleeve of Girl Scout cookies (not that I know anything about that).  How long did you last this year. I made it into the beginning of March which is quite impressive actually. Then, the Girl Scout cookies hit.

Anyway, there are a whole boatload of studies linking how we take care of ourselves to the quality of our sex life. Not only is it a self esteem issue, there are all sorts of other factors at play. Sex is an aerobic activity and it requires a healthy heart to get the blood flowing to all the right places. Also, if we are constantly fatigued from eating bad foods and couch potato living, sex is going to be the last thing on our minds.

So, I would encourage you to spend a bit of time thinking about how you take care our your body. What are your eating habits? I recently read an interesting article about a diet and supplements that can increase your sexual desire. It involved a whole lot of fish oil tablets. My fish oil tablets have a big statement on the label that says “Does not cause fish burps.” Thank God for that cause nothing screams sexual turn off like fish burps. I have no idea what that means, but the hubby is thinking the fish oil thing is worth a try. Either way, a healthy diet just makes you feel better all over which may make you more up for a little roll in the hay.

You ever seen the “Let’s Get Physical” video? Nothing screams sexy like Olivia Newton John and spandex. Sexy outfits aside, exercise is a great stress reliever and as mommies we know stress can definitely get in the way of bedroom activities. Heck, sex itself is exercise. You can burn about 7 calories per 5 minutes of sex. Um…maybe you should keep your gym membership too. The point is some cardio and flexibility training might do wonders for your sex life.

Finally, I would be remiss if I did not highlight one particular exercise that is very important for anyone who has pushed a very large baby through a very small opening. Kegel exercises strengthen the pelvic floor muscles which often get stretched out during pregnancy (along with a multitude of other things). Not only is this helpful in saving money on Depends, it can help make your sex life more gratifying. Check out some tips in this article.

So there you have it. One more reason to head to the gym and lay off the Cheetos. If you are like me and love to eat, but hate to exercise, I leave you with this piece of encouraging news. Research has shown that women who eat a lot of chocolate report having much more satisfying sex lives. Is that the best news you have heard in your whole life? Suddenly that entire bag of M&Ms you consumed while watching American Idol doesn’t seem so bad. Not that I know anything about that…