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The Choice to be Unpopular

March 21, 2010

Remember Jr. High? No? Yeah, I tried to block it out too. But from what I recall, pretty much the whole goal was to be popular. I wish I could say it got better from there, you know, once we grow up. But you and I both know, the pressure is still there.  Except now it comes from more than just your friends. Suddenly there is pressure to be popular with your children.

Growing up, I knew my parents were strict. When other kids had curfews of midnight, mine was at ten. When other kids could have boys in their room, I wasn’t allowed. When other kids could watch whatever they wanted on TV and at the movies, I wasn’t allowed to even watch MTV. And I swore I wouldn’t be like that. I swore, I would be the cool mom.

And then I had kids. And suddenly my parents didn’t seem near strict enough. My kids can only watch a handful of TV shows. We barely even do movies. And boys? My goodness, my girls won’t date until they are at least twenty-one. I mean I can’t believe my parents let us out of the house at all.

In all seriousness, I have become OK with being unpopular. In fact, I am troubled by parents who make parenting decisions based on being “popular” with their children. I am not here to be my kid’s best friend. I am here to be their parent. To set boundaries, make rules and enforce them, and hope that someday the framework I have set for them allows them to make good choices of their own accord.

I know I might not always be my kid’s favorite person. I may not even be popular with other parents. But someday when my kids have kids, I think like me, they will realize that when it comes to parenting, being popular isn’t the goal. And I hope, like me, they will love and appreciate the way I parented more than they ever thought possible.

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My New Favorite

March 20, 2010

T-shirt::: Social Media Diagram

Etsy Shop::: dedeetsyshop

Reason NOT to eat fast food: Happy Meal Ageless

How about another::: 4 yo Cheeseburger

Story of Hope::: Celebrating Our Story

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Frugal Friday- Eating Healthy on a Budget

March 18, 2010

I asked my friend Heather to guest post for me today about eating healthy on a budget. I am just starting my journey and she is my go to person with every little question I have about whole foods. I am her grasshopper.

When my clients or friends start transitioning into eating better, one of their first concerns is always cost: “Isn’t healthier food more expensive?”

Well, if we’re talking about Ramen noodles and off-brand macaroni and cheese, I’m not going to compete with that kind of budget. And if we’re talking about expensive processed cereals that say they’re organic or the substitutes we’re seeing on the shelves – like organic pop-tarts – then, yes, that food IS expensive.

But eating healthier doesn’t mean we just grab a different box of cereal because it has the word “organic” on it. When I see “eat healthier,” I mean getting back to real, whole foods – the ones found on the outside edges of the grocery store. This kind of eating is not only better for your body, but is also friendly to your pocket.

There’s so much information to discuss with this topic that I just want to scratch the surface with some very basic elements of eating well and doing it on a budget. I have outlined three categories to focus on when you start making good changes in your diet and lifestyle (because changes to your diet will also mean changes to the way you shop, the way you cook, and the way you eat).

1. Water – frankly, this should be its own category on the food guide pyramid. Most people don’t drink nearly enough water. In my house, this is our beverage of choice. And when you are drinking water, this means you are NOT drinking all the other sugary juice, pop, and tea that don’t do anything to hydrate you and will also strain your food budget.

2.  Vegetables – I will put it simply: eat more vegetables. We’re coming into spring and summer, the perfect time to get acquainted with the best vegetables of the year. During this time, you can buy fresh, local produce at farmer’s markets and even some grocery stores will sell locally grown foods. Have you ever tasted a just-picked-that-day carrot? Oh, the sweetness and the crunch…so delicious! Food is fresher and tastier the sooner you eat it once it’s been picked and buying seasonal produce is always cheaper (you’ll notice your grocery store will often feature sale items on produce because it’s in season – like oranges in the winter!). Better yet, purchase a share in a local farm, save even more money, and get a weekly pick-up of locally grown foods.

3. Whole Grains – this category can be confusing because even a box of Lucky Charms boasts that it’s made with whole grains. True, most foods start off as a whole grain…and this is where we want to stop. Heavily processed cereals are just that, processed. Eating whole grains means eating the WHOLE grain. I’m talking about foods like brown rice, quinoa, millet, oats, and barley. Any of those sound like Greek to you? It’s time to get acquainted. Visit your local health food store and ask for help. Most health food stores sell grains in bulk (which is much cheaper) and they can teach you how to cook and prepare the grains. A good online resource for recipes with alternative grains is wholefoodsmarket.com.

4.  Alternative Proteins – Whose husband is sick of baked chicken? Most of us learn how to cook dinner based around meat. What if, instead, you started with a vegetable or a grain or a bean? Think differently about the proteins that you cook with, especially at dinner. A meal with beans can be just as filling as a steak dinner. And, dried beans are much cheaper than meat! I am not necessarily advocating a vegetarian diet. I have plenty of friends who do well without eating meat, but my body is not made like that – I need some beef to keep the meat on my bones. But I don’t necessarily plan my meals around meat. When I added more variety and better vegetables and whole grains into my cooking – more creativity – I found I could use less meat. I often think about meat as a condiment rather than the main-stage production.

This is just a start to eating well on a budget. But we all have to begin somewhere, right? When I first started eating well, I didn’t think about replacing the foods that I was already eating, and I didn’t think about starting from scratch. Instead, every time I went to the grocery store, I decided that I would try one new vegetable. In this way, I kept things creative in the kitchen and was trying new recipes with new foods, but I also made slow, positive changes. After a few months, the make-up of my kitchen was very different and I was eating more whole, natural foods…these foods had crowded out the junky, processed foods I had been eating before and I barely noticed the transition.

For more frugal tips, head over to Life As Mom.

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